Sparkadia

Hello,

We spent 28 days in mainland europe, visited 10 countries and 24 cities so we thought we would do a "best of" list. If your country or city is not mentioned, we apologise. No offence, but there comes a time when you have to step up. Rome wasn't built in a day, true, but you don't see them resting on their laurels!

Best Coffee - Italy.

Even the italian autogrills have better coffee than the best coffee in germany. Baristas are gods and a shit coffee is unforgiveable.

Best Beer - Bremen.

This was a tough decision to make. We had way too much beer and many different types, many of which were consumed when we were drunk which doesn't help with the judging process. Even though Carlsberg Beer claimed it was 'probably the best beer in the world', Becks and Bremen dominated.

Best Moules & Frites - Brussels.

Although we were jetlagged and our senses were wack, Brussels dominated in the moules frites category. The accompanying condiments were impressive and compliments for the dijonnaise and aioli.

Best Scenery - Switzerland.

As most of our driving involves ugly highways and grim open plains, our drive from Milan to Zurich was inspiring. Deep blue lakes with snowy mountains above leading to stunning hills accompanied with fairytale cottages and windmills made our arrival at the venue a downer.

Best Venue - Amsterdam.

Playing the Paradiso, a converted church in the city of sin, was easily the most beautiful venue.

Best Shower - Munich.

Most venues pay little attention to the important human needs such as toilets, showers, food and water. Well they do, but it is always secondary to beer and liquor. The showers at most venues were weaker than hostel showers...you know those ones that you have to press every five seconds to find that the hot water is gone and the cold water is dripping down the wall...well Munich had state of the art nozzles and water pressure. Well done Munich.

Best Meal - Italy

Italians do food and coffee better than anyone else. If you disagree, you are wrong.

Best Bears Dick - Holland

For those that are unaware of bears dick, it is a cylindrical tube filled with some form of meat and gravy(don't ask exactly what it REALLY is) with crusty schnitzel on the outside. Amazing highway food.

Best Looking CBD - Oslo

Go there and you'll know.

Best Church - Koln

The Milan Duomo was mind blowing. Believe you me. It was no accident that it was so impressive. The people of Milan over 15 generations spent 500 years building their church. Super effort guys. Even now the people of milan are restoring the inside and outside-a project that will take another two hundred odd years to complete and millions of dollars donated by the people of Milan. Fantastic news guys...But sadly, you came second. Unlucky.

Best Red Light District - Tie between Hamburg and Amsterdam.

Both cities stepped up in the category of red light districts. You want sex and drugs in weird and filthy combinations all at the same time in the middle of the street at 4am in the morning whilst being mugged and kind of enjoying it-get involved.

Best Truck Stops - Germany

We spent about two weeks in germany and the efficiency and charms of the truck stops never ceased to amaze. So many types of ritter sport chocolate!

Best After Party - Berlin

We entered "White Trash" with high hopes of being debauched and we definitely achieved our goal. We lost nick for 24 hours, nick lost his phone, ab lost his sanity, tiff lost her voice, someone gave dave a jacket, some random girl started an improptu burlesque performance in front of ab, we all lost our innocence.

Best Nicest venue staff - Copenhagen

Danish venue staff were charming. thats about it...no funny story there.

Best Wiener Schnitzel - Vienna

no one else made an effort in this category.

Best Spooky Venue - Wiesbaden.

Playing in an old slaughterhouse was creepy. The desolate area around the venue reminded us of a place where a killer would dump the victim in one of those CSI type anagram tv shows where then the investigation team would be informed of the body and get involved solving the crime.

Best After show chat that went on too long - Nurnburg

Some dodgy guy stood in front of our van and wanted to chat and smoke and generally be best friends. He had been kicked out for vomiting on the stairs of the venue -nice- and now wanted to "just hang" and swap emails and be the godfather of our kids and bake us a chocolate cake and all. It was grim. Don't get us wrong, we love meeting new people and hanging out but there comes a point where the night is over. That guy was weeks after the end of the night.

Best Freakiest Hostel Guests - Hamburg.

If you get your kicks out of walking in on people on the toilet, then you are wrong.

Most embarrassing on-stage moment -

In Wiebaden Tiff lead us all offstage, but sadly it was the wrong side of the stage with no exit. So the lights come back on and we are all huddled in the corner of the stage. Awkward. So we are on the wrong side of stage and then have to creep meekly back across it. Super awkward.

Most listened to album in the car - Vampire Weekend

Great record. Great guys. Go get it.

Toughest Security Guards - Tie between Hamburg and Switzerland

Both cities have the most built and scary security guards. Think again about crowd surfing as they eat naughty kids for dessert.

So there are the best best of winners.

Well done to the winners.

Unlucky to the losers, there's always next tour.

Laters.